If you’d rather listen to me reading this post, click here.
This is how I do a text reading: four cards, representing situation, what to know, advice, and where it looks like things are going. It’s a simple four-card spread that I use a lot–many readers use either this or a three-card draw for a quick look at something. I often also glance at the card on the bottom of the deck to understand the deeper context.
This one, though, is a reading I did for myself, realizing that procrastination is fueled by anxiety.
The very first card speaks to the need for meditation, the need to pause at the crossroads and breathe. The situation may not call for such immediate action as the anxiety itself thinks it does. The Emperor as “what to know” has special meaning to me because it’s my birth card, but it’s also an anxiety tell. People who want to control their own little world: These are the anxious. Sometimes the anxious are kind, loving people. Sometimes they are bullies. But either way, the drive at the bottom of the situation is anxiety. Every Emperor or would-be Emperor is damn anxious. Nobody is trying to bully me (except me, myself, and I!). But if anyone is trying to bully you, keep in mind: That person is anxious. Deep down, they are not confident.
My advice card, the Four of Swords, speaks pretty clearly to rest. And it’s so exasperating. To someone with ADHD, with a sleep disorder, with some sort of chronic connective tissue stuff going on–I rest soooooo much. I have an app on my phone telling me to rest more (it’s the free version of the Visible app, but it did predict an absolute crash within my first week of using it–maybe that was a coincidence, this is not an endorsement of the app, but I’m just saying). More rest!
Okay, whatever. It’s true, though. And you anxious folks out there, you probably do need rest too. It doesn’t have to be a nap. I’m thinking, personally, it might be reading a novel or two. Maybe I need a rest from the news. Maybe I need a rest from other specific things. Maybe I need a rest from sitting in this chair–in other words, my rest could consist of standing up and walking around. Think about this for yourself. What do you need a rest from–being awake, or something else?
Finally: the Seven of Pentacles. Y’all. The seeds will grow or they won’t. If you keep watering those plants, they definitely won’t, you’ll find yourself growing fungal gnats instead. Been there done that. If you need to rest, then rest. The clocks are still ticking, the plants are still growing, the momentum of whatever it may be is still underway. Think of it as a nap on a plane. You’ll still reach your destination. (I mean, this metaphor presumes you’re not the one flying the plane, but you get my point.)
At the bottom of the deck: the Queen of Swords. Welp. If anyone needs a rest, it’s probably the overanalytical. The one who notices every goddamn detail and remembers them all, too. She needs a rest because she can see what’s going on here. Whatever is growing, whatever is brewing, yes, you’ll still have to deal with it, but if you can’t do anything about it right now, then do the thing that will give you the ease and the rest to be able to cope with it when the time is right for you to deal with it.
I was going to write a blog post for October, for the month ahead, but let’s call this it.
Quiet Bonnie 