Exiled from the Family? Lay Your Own Foundation

Four of Pentacles reversed--Yoga TarotToday’s cards, the reversed Four of Pentacles and reversed TenTen of Swords reversed--Yoga Tarot by Lo Scarabeo of Swords (again with the Ten of Swords!) from the Yoga Tarot, have to do with laying the proper foundations for the choices that we are making. We can’t go forward on one path until we have healed the wounds from the last journey, and that healing involves speaking. The yogi on the Ten of Swords card seems to be turning blue with the strain of not speaking! And keeping hard truths under wraps is often the watchword for families during the holidays. The emphasis is on being happy, happy, happy, and not on explaining to our loved ones just what it is that is piercing us. Also, upside-down, the Four of Pentacles from the Yoga Tarot looks as though it is saying TV (the T is in the edges of the mandala, while the V is formed by the upside-down pyramid pose). In some families, during gatherings, the t.v. is dominant — and that can impede the speaking of truths tremendously. It’s hard enough to talk about what may be bothering you without having to fit your comments into a short commercial break.

This is a healing struggle, and possibly it’s a struggle to heal the family. These cards look a lot to me like the cards of one person who feels like an exile from the family. This might be by choice, which is fine. It might be your choice not to share your feelings, but to keep those feelings bottled up or to empty them into a journal. Whether or not one chooses to speak up about one’s feelings, though, I still recommend finding a way to turn these cards right-side up again. A strong connection to the Earth, through meditation, grounding, rooting, and balance is what I think will do it.

Also, remember that if your normal routines and rituals have been disrupted, this could be contributing to a sense of malaise. Try to keep your normal practices intact. If these practices nurture you at other times, they will nurture you even more when you have family to deal with.

Either way, though, this is still your life and your path. Lay your foundations for the future privately if you can’t speak about them publicly.


  1. Your healing medicine is excellent salve today for holiday visits and a reminder that we can always choose to heal ourselves no matter what other family members choose. To sit silently with family for a time and watch dysfunction so that we can clearly name it – the very specifics of it – helps. Often it is hard to find our voice when we have been in the web of distorted messages and miscommunication. Finding our true voice can take a little time and is ALWAYS worth the attention to Self.


    1. Thanks, Laurel! Everything you say here is right on target. More so than my original post, actually! I especially like your statement that “we can always choose to heal ourselves no matter what other family members choose.”


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