I don’t have cats living with me any more (my husband is severely allergic to them). Or do I? Everyone who has lived with cats knows the feeling of a cat jumping onto the bed at night, walking around, and then settling in. Though I don’t have living cats any more, I still, very frequently, can feel cats jumping onto the bed and settling in. Do I have a ghost cat or two still living with me? I certainly hope so!
Likewise, I once heard my husband’s stepfather (who had passed away several years earlier) pacing around my office and using language that I, personally, feel I should not repeat in my blog. He seemed to be worrying that my husband was taking a rather disorganized approach to a trip we were planning — and expressed his frustration in language so colorful that I had frankly never heard that particular expression before.
Well, everyone expresses love in different ways.
The theme of this year’s Samhain blog hop is love, and if you’re thinking, “those crazy tarot readers got their holidays mixed up!”, I’m here to tell you that, with respect, I don’t think so. First of all, who doesn’t LOVE Halloween? But more importantly — this is the time of year when we most easily connect with the spirit world — and honestly, that connection is NOT about scaring the pants off us — fun as that might be — it’s about love.
Can you truly be separated from someone you love deeply — even by death?
Now this is where this post is going to get a little corny. But I don’t care — because I think these two songs each make a point. Because, when you think about it, there are two ways to reunite with someone you love who has died.
The first way is to connect with them in the spirit world — or in spirit, if you prefer. This doesn’t have to mean seeing or hearing ghosts (although it could). It could be a connection in a dream. Or it could be something as simple as writing letters to your loved one who has passed on. All those things you wanted to be able to say to that person? You still can. Put them in a letter. The heart is an efficient post office. Trust me on this.
My second totally corny song, to me, has reincarnation written all over it. Maybe you don’t believe in reincarnation. But haven’t you met people in your life who you know, without a doubt, that you knew before? The connections of the heart DO have a tendency to bring us back into contact with those we have loved in past lives — and we do recognize them, whether we realize it consciously or not. We recognize them, and in some cases, we come back again and again looking for them — because the attachment of the heart is that strong.
Maybe it’s spooky to think about connecting, again, with someone who has passed. But I don’t think so. Love does transcend death. Death doesn’t have the power to part us — or not for long.
As I write this, I’m thinking not only of people I know who have passed on, but also of clients who have come in hoping to find peace after the death of a loved one. The truth is, that yes, you can use tarot to find some measure of peace even after having your life torn apart in this way. And tarot can be a lovely, and gentle, way to work with the situation. But — you don’t NEED tarot for this. Because your loved ones are not separated from you. They are not. You might not feel their presence as strongly at some times as you do at other times. But they are there. Don’t worry about this.
How do I know? I could give you several answers to that question. But one answer is this. One of my grandmothers (and I was one of the lucky people who have more than just two!) died over the summer. She had come close to death before, because of her struggle with cancer. While Nana was in the hospital, there were times when she told my parents that she could see her entire family standing around her bed — her parents, grandparents, people who were no longer among the living. My parents, of course, thought her medication was affecting her brain. But if so, why did she only see family members who were dead? Moreover, Nana was lucid in every other way — right up to the end.
Sometimes it takes a grandchild to believe a grandparent. But my feeling is this. My grandparents were not ever what you would call flaky. They, all of them, had plenty of common sense. And if Nana says her dead parents came to visit her while she was sick, I see no reason not to believe her. It sounds just like something they would have done. And when someone who you know to be intelligent and down to earth tells you something that sounds a little flaky, my feeling is, I’m willing to trust that this person knows what they are talking about. Particularly when it’s a person who has lived nearly a century and has a lot more experience of the world than I do.
So what I’m trying to say is, this Halloween, this Samhain, remember this. The spirits are with us not to scare us (even though it may be fun to be scared, sometimes). They are with us because they love us, because we love them, and because the heart can accomplish amazing miracles that we are just beginning to understand.